Special Delivery

So the big day has finally arrived and we can breathe a big sigh of relief. It wasn't nearly as bad as we had prepared ourselves for, in fact it went pretty amazingly well.

We arrived at the Civil Affairs Office with our guide, Lily about ten minutes early so they led us into a room to wait. It had wooden floors and several big, plastic play structures, so it was obviously meant for this sort of occasion. From the next room we could hear a little girl crying hysterically. Of course we assumed it was Grace. Someone was walking her up and down the hallway, speaking to her in Chinese and trying to calm her down. We waited and listened some more, telling ourselves that this was normal and it was what we had prepared ourselves for. We asked Lily how many times she had been present for an event like this and she said she didn't know how often, but never for a baby who was this upset. Great.

Then a woman appeared leading a little girl by the hand who was happy and excited, with her suitcase in hand and dressed in a traditional red silk outfit. Dave jumped up with the video camera but it was not Grace. It was a three year old who knew she was going to her new family and couldn't wait to get there. As it turned out she is staying across the hall from us in our hotel and will be going home to Louisiana...orVirginia? I forget. Anyway, they had come into the room by mistake and soon left. Next door the crying continued. My palms were very sweaty. Lily went out to check. Then we heard a "squeak, squeak, squeak, squeak" coming from the hallway. It stopped and started again. Then it got louder. Lily appeared and told us that the crying baby was not Grace but another little girl who had just met her family next door. Then Grace and two women from the orphanage entered the room.

She was wearing the traditional Chinese "squeaky shoes" which kids wear to encourage them to learn how to walk by squeaking with each step. She was wearing a red "Hello Kitty" dress with a pink collar. Her hair was in a little pony tail sticking straight up on top and tied in a big, red scrunchy. She had two things around her neck: a jade heart pendant on a red string and a Mickey Mouse toy cell phone that opened and played music when you pushed the buttons. She looked very calm and the ladies encouraged her to come to us. She squeaked over and handed me a small nut, a kind of local fruit. I held out the doll that I had brought for her but she didn't seem to know what to do with it. She stood and checked us out and pretty soon the ladies from the orphanage left saying, "take good care of the baby!" We promised that we would.

Lily took a picture and I put Grace on my lap. Then she said we were through and we could go back to the hotel. The whole thing took about 5 minutes. Of course there would be more paperwork later, but that was it for the hand-off. So I picked her up and off we went. She was still very calm and just checking everything out.

We drove back to the hotel and walked across the lobby where the family with the crying baby was taking pictures. The baby was still crying. We went up to the room and Lily had us sign some more papers including pressing our thumb print in red ink next to our signature. Then we had to take an "official picture" for something or other and that is when the crying began.

They wanted us to sit very close together on the bed and hold her up between us. She didn't like that and started crying. We managed to get a picture that they approved of and then everybody left and it was just us. The crying continued. I think it was about now that she realized what a dirty trick her friends from the orphanage had played on her and she was none too happy about it. From what I have read and the people I have talked to though, it was all very normal and not too extreme. She still allowed me to hold her and could sometimes be distracted with a book or a toy. She liked the lift-the-flap books and was very good at doing them herself. We stacked and unstacked some plastic cups and she kept pushing the buttons on her Mickey phone. I couldn't help but wonder if her foster family hadn't given her that as if to say, "you can always call us if you need to talk."

Then right in the middle of a bout of crying she fell almost instantaneously asleep on my shoulder. I sat down on the bed and she slept like that for about an hour. Dave went out and got some noodles since we knew she must be hungry, but she was out before he got back with them. When she woke up we tried feeding her the various things they had told us she liked but she wasn't interested. Her "instructions" said she went to bed around ten o'clock and it was nine thirty so we put her p.j.s on and sat her in her crib. She sat quietly and just watched us. She seems fascinated by Dave (that or terrified, we don't know which) but she won't let him hold her yet.

I laid down on the bed right next to her crib and closed my eyes to show her it was time to sleep, but she just looked at me, so I layed her back and put the covers on. In about 10 minutes she was out and slept all night until eight o'clock this morning.

So far today we have only had one brief crying spell. She wants to be held by me the whole time. Once when I went into the bathroom she stood up and pointed and held her arms out. We took that as a good sign. At breakfast she ate congee and eggs by herself with a spoon held perfectly in her left hand. She has started pointing at things and making noises, although her sheet said she doesn't speak any words yet. We've gotten exactly two smiles today and lots of eye contact. She doesn't seem to know what to do with a bottle and her info said she drinks formula from a cup, but she did let me feed her some jarred baby food this afternoon.

We had to go back to the Civil Affairs office to finish paperwork today. The crying baby was back as well, still crying. There was a brief ceremony where they asked us if we still wanted her, basically. We said yes, gave them lots of money (which they made a point of promising would only be spent to support the orphans still in the orphanage) and were off again. Lily took us to a supermarket to get some clothes and baby food and then back to the hotel for a nap. Grace fell asleep right away and slept for a good two hours. Dave went out to explore and I stayed here and did this.

Update: She woke up from the nap about two hours ago and has absolutely blossomed! She has completely explored/demolished the room, took everything out of the shopping bags and handed it to us, colored on paper and herself with markers, made her way through half a canister of banana rice puffs, moved her pile of toys from one side of the room to the other about five times and discovered her image in the mirror (very much in love, many kisses) She's smiling and active, handing us everything and has even started to laugh and babble. It's truly amazing; I'd heard it could happen but until I saw it with my own eyes I couldn't believe it; truly amazing. We know there will be times when she will still grieve for her foster family, but we feel that the bonding process has begun and should continue. We will be visiting the orphanage on Thursday and they said they would call the foster family and invite them to come there to meet us. Even though we know it will be dificult, we believe it will be what's best for her in the long run. When she is older and asks us who took care of her in China we will be able to tell her for sure and we think that will be important. The foster family did send along some pictures for her to keep as well as the single-use camera we sent them.

Today she let Dave pick her up once without crying but she still won't leave my sight. As I am typing she is playing at my feet, babbling and handing me things. The handing seems to be a big deal.

So that's it. We're just hanging out and waiting until Friday when her Chinese Passport will be ready and we will fly to Guangzhou for the American end of the deal. Thanks for all the emails and words of encouragement. It means a lot to us!

T-minus two hours and counting

So we are in our room in Nanning just waiting for 3:15 to roll around so we can go meet our guide, Lily, who will take us to the Civil Affairs office to meet Grace. In an effort to divert our attention we are going to update the blog. Otherwise we might drive ourselves and each other crazy with our nerves. Actually, I am more calm right now than I have been in the last 2 days. On the flight from Beijing I had to do some serious deep breathing to keep my composure, but now that it's about to happen, I'm just excited to meet her and get her back to the hotel and start getting to know her.

So, to recap - on Sunday we started with a trip to Tiananmen Square and the Forbidden City. It was quite an event. Even though there were a fair amount of other foreigners there, we were quite the spectacle. TiananmenSquare can hold half a million people at one time. The line of Chinese tourists to view Mao Tse Tung's tomb was around and around and around and out of sight. And every last one of them gave us a once over. They're not shy about staring. I'm not sure if it's because I'm a tall woman or have somewhat lighter hair, but they all just stopped in their tracks and looked me up and down. More than one person took a picture, and one lady tapped me on the shoulder and asked to be photographed with me. Now, our guide, Iko, said right away that she thought I looked like the tennis player, Lindsey Davenport, which I've heard before, and some of her friends who we met later agreed with her. Maybe they thought I was famous!
Anyway, we walked across the square, which took a while, and then entered the Forbidden City. First we had to photograph the big portrait of Chairman Mao along with everyone else. At one point as Iko was giving her spiel about Chairman Mao (all positive of course) a middle-aged Chinese man walked up to our group, stood and listened, and then walked away when she was done. Later she said she was just being checked up on.
The Forbidden City was one impressive structure around a massive courtyard after another. We learned all about the history of the Emperors and Empresses. The Forbidden City itself has 9,999 rooms, because heaven apparently has ten thousand rooms and one wouldn't want to compete with that. And you need that many rooms when you marry your wife, spend three days with her and then never see her again because you are too busy fathering hundreds of children with all of your concubines so that a worthy heir can be chosen from one of them. The most impressive/depressing part was that right smack dab in the middle in a tiny little room was a Starbucks Coffee Shop! and the funniest part was that when I tried to take video of the inside, which looked just like a Starbucks anywhere else, the guy behind the counter jumped out and said, "not in here, not in here!" Go figure.
From the Forbidden City we said goodbye to Laura who was heading to the Yangtse River for a cruise down tha portion that will soon disappear behind the massive Three Gorges Dam project. Then Iko accompanied us to the airport for said flight to Beijing with said borderline panic attack and we were picked up at the airport by our new guide: Lily! Lily learned a good portion of her English from watching "Friends" on the internet and more than once has referred to one of the characters or the plotline as if it were reality. Example:

Lily: How do you pronounce your last name, it looks very difficult?

Me: It's Hojnacki. I know, even Americans have a hard time with it. Lucky me for marrying into it.

Lily: Well at least it's not as bad as Monica - I mean she had to go and marry someone named Bing!

Otherwise she is very nice and has agreed to try to help us get in touch with the foster family and go visit the orphanage. The weather remains very, very humid. Just walking outside for a few minutes leads to dripping with sweat, but the hotel is nicely air conditioned. Nanning is much more lush and green than Beijing. The city itself is not as massive and industrial even though over two million people live here. There are many more bicycles and mopeds and buses here. Lily told us that Nanning was known for being the Chinese capital of the motorcycle since so many people rode them here, so the government had the bright idea to ban all new motorcycle permits to encourage the automobile industry. (sigh) Beijing was just one big traffic jam, but here there is a dizzying mix all other form of transportation, just not many cars yet. You take your life into your own hands at each intersection as there appear to be no traffic lights even at the crossing of two four lane roads. Somehow everyone just goes, pedestrians and bikers included. Left turns, changing lanes; nothing phases them and curiously nobody gets hit. Dave and I have decided however that the two of us will cause an accident before we leave because on our first foray out this morning through packed streets for an hour we saw exactly one other non-asian; a white man on a bike, and some of the moped drivers almost swerved onto the sidewalk to get a look at us. We wonder how it will be when we go out tomorrow with Grace. I guess we will find out soon because it's time to go!!!!

Wish us luck. We will try to post as soon as we can.

Much Love,
Susan

Pictures!!! (of us)

O.K. - we've figured out that it was just the pictures that the foster family sent us which will not post. But all the ones from our camera seem to work. So you all have to look at our mugs for one more day before we can get some pictures of Grace. Here are some from the Great Wall. Later today we'll fly to Nanning. Sometime tomorrow we will meet her. Off to breakfast!

Day #2

Lots and lots of sightseeing in Beijing. We started the day at the Great Wall, but unfortunately because of the weather, didn't see too much of it. It was extremely foggy and muggy so even though we walked all the way to the top tower, we never saw anything more than 10 feet away from us. So we've seen every step but none of the beautiful views of the wall stretching out across the rolling hills that you see so many pictures of. It was very steep at points and because of the heat everyone was dripping with sweat right away. Since it was Saturday there were many Chinese tourists from outside of Beijing and they were very interested in us. We got lots of stares. Nothing rude, just looking at us for a long time without caring whether we noticed or not. By the time we got back down to the entrance it was packed and it took us twice as long to finish the last two sections because we had to muscle our way through the crowds coming up. Some of the areas are quite narrow, so that wasn't easy.

After the Great Wall we were taken to the Summer Palace. It is a huge lake and gardens where the Emperors of the Qing dynasty would spend their summers. It was very beautiful and I could see how it would have been a peaceful place if not for the throngs of tourists there as well. There were some beautiful temples, statues and gardens to walk through and Iko gave us the history of everything as we walked.

Next we were taken on a tour of a local neighborhood by pedicab: a modern rickshaw of sorts that they peddle while you sit in the back and relax. The neighborhoods are called Hutong and some have been around for over two hundred years. They are low brick or mud/cement buildings built around narrow alleyways. Many of the homes have inner courtyards and the people sit outside to do just about anything including playing cards, drinking beer, washing clothes, shining shoes or just talking. It looked like a very peaceful and simple way of life. Of course our guide told us that most of those areas are being torn down to make way for new high-rises in preparation for the Beijing Olympics in 2008. That's a shame because they have been a part of the culture for so long and many of the older people are fighting to keep the areas intact.

There was a small area of this neighborhood that they had set up as an example and we could go inside and were served lunch in the rooms. The food was very good: rice, dumplings, pork with garlic shoots, chicken with onions, sliced tomatoes sprinkled with sugar and some really yummy peanuts. Of course we had to try the local Beijing beer which is also quite tasty.

Finally we were dropped off at a local market to look around and try our hands at bargaining if we wanted. There was clothing, silk, jewelry, electronics, art work, even golf clubs! We tried out some of the phrases we'd learned such as "tai guay le!" which means "too expensive!" and did pretty well. Dave and I bought a dress for Grace's little foster sister for $10.00 and a set of worry balls - painted metal balls with little bells inside that you roll in the palm of your hand. They are pretty and have a strangely calming effect. We had seen some when we visited Barbara in Germany, and we only paid $1! Laura bought a beautiful silk tablecloth and a Mah Jong set and Dave really considered buying an IPod Nano for $50 but couldn't make up his mind...hmmm.

Now we are back at the room and we are going to go out to an area with lots of bars and restaurants on our own this evening. Tomorrow we will see Tiananmen Square and then fly to Nanning. Monday is gotcha day!

Our pictures don't seem to be posting for some reason. Eblogger tells us that they have been uploaded onto the blog, but when we preview it they are not there. We're not sure if that's because of being in China or if it's an issue with our laptop. We'll keep working on it.

Lots of love

Greetings from Beijing!

What an amazing day. And it just never seems to end. About 28 hours ago we got up, dropped the kids off at farm school and headed to the airport. The flight, all told, was relatively easy. We met our friends Andrea and Laura at the gate who just happened to be on the same flight to Chicago with us. Then in Chicago we met our travel partner, Laura and had to run through O'Hare to make it to our Beijing flight on time. We got on the jetway and they closed the door behind us.

The flight took about 13 hours and we were surprised to learn that we were flying straight up and over the North Pole, then down over Siberia to land in Beijing. Somehow we had imagined something more westward, like L.A. to Tokyo, but when the first map of our progress appeared on the screen and showed us over the Hudson Bay, we figured otherwise. Fittingly (or ironically) we watched the movie "Eight Below" about a bunch of sled dogs in the Antarctic. We took naps, ate, read, walked around, did some Sudoku and the next thing we knew, we were landing.

Our guide is named Iko. She is a Chinese woman who speaks very good English and has been very patient and helpful with us. She had a van waiting to take us to the hotel where we napped for a few hours and then we were taken to a Chinese Acrobatics show and to dinner at a Chinese restaurant.

Right before we left the room for the show, we checked our email to find that Grace's foster family had emailed us back and sent pictures. So the $40,000 question is...is it the same girl from the photos? And the answer is.....no, but she's pretty darn cute her own self and her lip has been repaired none-the-less. So we're re-adjusting to a new image in our heads and getting ready to go get our Gracie on Monday. The letters from her foster family have been so warm and reassuring, so we are really looking forward to meeting them and learning all about Grace.

Tomorrow we will see the Great Wall and Tiananmen Square with Iko. So now, even though it's almost noon home time and midnight here, we are going to try to get some sleep. I'll post the new pictures so that you all can start recognizing her as well. We will also be taking down the post with the other pictures since we will soon have many more accurate ones to put up.

By the way we are adding this part later. We have discovered that we are able to publish to our blog but we are not able to view it from here. It is apparently blocked within China (a bit too much freedom of speech I guess) so I don't know what it looks like, but can only assume that it's posting the way I want. Please email us with any info and comments at shojnacki@sbcglobal.net since we can't read the comments on the blog.

Leaving Tomorrow

In the flurry of activity over the past few days I forgot to post that we got our travel itinerary, booked our flights and are leaving for China on Thursday. Not much more to tell except that we're very busy getting everyone ready to go their separate ways and make sure nothing important gets lost in the shuffle. We've got all the paperwork we need, all the cash and, most importantly, Gracie's new blankie. It arrived yesterday with her name and other information embroidered on it just like the other girls'. We opted for purple and will take it with us when we meet her for the first time on Monday the 31st. Hopefully our computer will work as expected and we will be happily blogging away as soon as we arrive in Beijing on Friday. Our friend Laura Drake is accompanying us on the first and last leg of our journey and sightseeing on her own while we are in Nanning, so you may see her popping up on our blog along the way.

Other big news: we just received a letter from Grace's foster family! It arrived today in the mail. It is written in both English and Chinese by one of the grown children in the family who is a lawyer. It says they have three grown children and then Grace and one other six-month-old from the orphanage. It is a lovely letter which tells us what a kind and generous girl Hua-xue (Grace) is and how much they love her, but also that they are happy for her that she is coming to live with us for her better future. It says when she was one-year-old they took her to a baby crawling contest at a local festival and she won a prize! They received our package and have taken pictures with the camera for us to have when we come get her. She says they are looking forward to meeting us and even gave an email address and phone number so that we could contact them. I can't believe it arrived the day before we are leaving. We will try to call them tonight when it is daytime over there.

Our next post will be from China, wish us luck.

More than corn

Proving once again that there is more than corn in Indiana, the Hojnacki's concluded a successful family trip to Indiana Beach on beautiful Lake Schaefer in Monticello, IN. It was a wonderful last hurrah for us as a family of four and the girls had a blast. We went non-stop from open until close including the waterpark, games and all of the rides. Some of the girls' favorites included the many kiddie rides (how many ways can a kid ride in a circle and still have fun?) the bumper cars, tilt-a-whirl, scrambler, Ferris wheel, and even the log flume. Actually Lily was scared to death on that one and vowed to never go again, but otherwise they were in kid heaven.
After the kids were finally in bed several of the "grown-ups" took advantage of their wrist bands to get in the last few rides of the night on the Cornball Express. Needless to say a good time was had by all.

Still waiting for our Consulate appointment in Guangzhou and then we will book our tickets. We've been told to still plan on leaving late this week, either Thurs. or Fri. The packing continues...

Cleared for take-off

The waiting is over and now the scrambling begins. Our agency called this morning to tell us that our Travel Approval (TA) had arrived, so we will soon be welcoming home baby girl #3. And if that wasn't exciting enough they wanted us to leave this Friday! (for future reference, note that today is Tuesday!!) We just weren't sure if we could pull that off so it looks like we will be going next Thursday or Friday, the 27th or 28th. It all depends on when we get our Embassy Appointment in Guangzhou. We will know that in the next two days. So now it's time to pack, organize the kids' time with various watchers and pull together all last minute details. Strangely enough there's not all that much to do. I've been slowly pulling all of the packing items together and we can't take that much with us as it is. I've purchased gifts for our guides and caretakers, ordered special cleft bottles to use and/or donate to the orphanage, and stocked up on all the recommended medicines, lotions, powders, sprays and other necessities that I've been told are...well, necessary.
I can't believe that in less than two weeks we will have her, it just doesn't seem possible. We just can't wait to meet her and bring her home for the rest of you all to meet. We'll let you know as we know more. Keep the comments coming!

One more week

Well, we thought we might hear something by the end of this week, but as it's Friday evening now, that's not looking too likely. Our agency did say they were expecting a group of travel notices next week by Tuesday or Wednesday so we've set our sights on that.

The big news of the day was that Sophie learned how to ride her bike with no training wheels today. We took them off on Wednesday when we got back from camping, at her request. I spent much of that day running up and down the block holding on to the back of her seat, but after much sweating and exhaustion on my part we weren't much further along. Yesterday we decided she just needed to try on her own so she spent the day trying to get started from the top of the street and balance her way down. Today we settled on a compromise where I would get her started and then let go and pretty soon...off she went! By this evening she was going the length of the street by herself. She's very excited because the block party is on Sunday and she'll get to ride in the street with all the big kids.

Here are a few pics from our camping trip to the Leelanau Peninsula in Northern Lower Michigan. The girls had a blast, parents are exhausted. Please appropriately appreciate the steepness of the grade in the shots at Sleeping Bear Dunes. That's a 450 ft sand dune that drops straight down into Lake Michigan for you uninitiated Michiganders. And Lily would like you all to know that she climbed back up half of it after descending further than her mom would have liked. And she would have none of anybody's help, mind you, but made it none-the-less. You can see how pleased she is in the one where I'm trying to give her a boost. For Sophie it was a piece of cake (would have been much easier if she hadn't been carrying that 10 lb. rock which is now gracing her bedroom as a doorstop, but who am I to say)

How This All Got Started

We are starting this blog today because we believe that we will soon hear news from China that it is time to travel. If you haven't been around from the beginning, or need a refresher, here's our story:

After having two daughters the "old-fashioned way" we decided that one more child was probably in the cards for us. Neither of us was set on having another biological child and somewhere along the way I came up with the idea of adopting from China. Obviously it's an idea that has gained huge popularity in this country over the past 5-10 years and it had just sort of seeped into my conciousness. If I had to trace it back to its roots, I would say it came to me one night while visiting friends in Denver (Hi Brian and Karen!) Sophie was sick and had thrown up several times before falling asleep in her sleeping bag on the floor by the couch where I was to sleep, but couldn't. I just kept picturing us going through the process and going to China to get a baby. I saw the whole thing in my head, wide awake, and it kept me up for several hours.

It was a few months later that I even brought it up to Dave and he was up for it, that crazy, trusting guy that he is. We mulled it over for a while and then decided to go ahead with the paperwork. That was 16 months ago and now it looks like we might be entering the home stretch. Along the way we have veered onto several different courses, but here is where we have ended up: Yuan HuaXue was born Dec. 1st, 2004 in Guangxi Province, China. She was abandoned at the doorstep of the Nanning Rehabilitation Center on her second day of life with her umbilical cord still attached. She was born with a unilateral cleft lip and palate but was otherwise full term and healthy. The orphanage in Nanning took care of her for the first three months and then she was placed with a foster family where we believe she has been living since.

The only information we have about her comes from a medical report written when she was about 8 months old. In the pictures we have, which we used to pick her as ours from the list of special needs children, she has virtually no hair, an unrepaired cleft lip and is staring seriously into the camera. In addition there are two photos of her standing outside and holding onto an umbrella stroller. She is wearing cotton shorts, a tank top with a cartoon character on it and no shoes. A friend of ours who has already adopted told us that was a sure sign she was with a foster family; no child in an orphanage would be taken outside so casually dressed and certainly not pushed in a stroller.

While we had originally asked for a healthy infant when this process began, we slowly began to consider a child with a special need after hearing what correctable issues many of them had. It took some contemplating, but we both came around to the idea rather quickly and decided that we didn't want to wait the extra time it was going to take to get a "non-special-needs" child. We wanted a little girl and felt we had the means to care for one who needed a little extra medical attention. There were three girls and two boys on our agency's waiting list. We thought briefly about a boy, but their medical issues seemed over our heads. That left us with the girls and we both picked Grace. She just looked like a kid who needed a chance and we called the next day to put her "on hold." We sent our Letter of Intent on May 5th and are currently waiting for travel approval. It should be coming any day.

Along the way we received some updated pictures which, through a long and complicated story, we are about 85% sure is her. I will post them here with the disclaimer that it could just be another really cute Chinese girl living with a foster family in Nanning who has had a cleft lip repaired. If it turns out not to be her, we figure she's going to look a lot like that anyway, so it gives us all a good idea.

We will try to post as many pictures and updates along the way as possible. Thanks for tuning in. We're glad you're going to be able to join us!

S&D